How doubting yourself can lead to the super power of Discernment 

Doubting ourselves can be so painful.

It seems to eat away at our natural confidence. What if I’ve got it badly wrong? The consequences could be so harmful. People might laugh at me! The shame of it all – I might never recover. I might want to hide away if they start telling me off.

It’s a horrible feeling because how do we know what’s true? In our world there are marketing voices, parental views of how to behave, and authority figures telling us how we should behave/think/exercise/eat/sleep and so on.

On the face of it doubt can sap your energy. Maybe it’s easier to give in and just be carried along by the loudest voice.

What about the other end of the scale? A confidence that is so pronounced that it seems Teflon-coated. No matter what arguments or reasoning are offered it is self-assured that only it knows “the” single truth on a topic. The charisma, and emphatic clout with which it operates become a blunt force instrument to ensure that all bend to its will.

It can be hard to resist such conviction. What if they are right, and I’m wrong? Meeting with such a voice can amplify your own doubts.

Such assuredness can help carry a cause or a mission to a place of significant reach. But in being so ‘deaf’ to other points of view it can also limit growth and evolution of the individual and the vision they are helping move forward.

I’m painting a picture of a very broad spectrum above. These are extremes. Hopefully we’re somewhere away from those end points on most topics. Usually there’s strength to be had in moving to somewhere near the middle between doubt and conviction; a place of balanced centredness. This is particularly important when done in keeping with your personal values.

Here’s a lens to approach the two opposing viewpoints and shift your thoughts and energy to a more balanced mid-point. Ask yourself the following 2 questions: 

These 2 questions are designed to help you grow in your discernment skills.

The more that you can heighten your observation skills, the more you can respond from an informed place of your own truth.

It’s important to know that you’re not going to stay static once you’ve reached a conclusion. You’re allowed to evolve and grow in your viewpoint as you gather more information and insight.

In my own experience, discernment has been a powerhouse of strength and self empowerment. It’s meant I’ve not been ensnared in group movements that were heading towards cult-like energy. I’ve been able to ask thoughtful questions to better understand motives and ensure my own course is set for what is best for me. As a result I’ve grown in my sense of freedom.

Discernment avoids the pitfalls of blind faith, adulation and following a cause out of emotional connection alone. We’re bringing in the art of reasoning.

Discernment, including the art of asking helpful questions, has helped me steer a safe moderate path based deeply on my own values of Empowerment, Gentleness, Kindness, Win/win and allowing Ease.

I encourage you to grow the Discernment muscle. It’s a skill that is needed in the turbulent and angry times we’re living in.